these dreams of late
leave me waking wide-eyed…
wondering…second guessing
the reality of where i find myself
in my waking hours…
and the strangeness of these dreams
pull me towards an abyss…an endless
fall towards you…i fall slowly…
as if drifting…like a feather;
gracefully swaying with gravity…
and in my waking hours
i find myself
listening for your smile…
waiting for the caress from your eyes…
only to realize that i am alone…
so i close my eyes and try hard
to go back to dreaming…but
sleep fails to come to me,
and my dreaming becomes a conscious
imagining of being with you –
sharing moments punctuated with a kiss –
burning…passionate and intoxicating…
and as if on queue, my arms
reach out to your side of the bed
only to find it cold and empty…occupied
by the silence that has filled the room…
i curl towards the empty space that
used to be yours…and i
rifle through memories…as if turning
the pages of your journal – trying to find the page
meant only for me…a page filled with
who i was to you – written in your heavy
cursive…but i find none…disappointed –
i open my eyes to be greeted by
sunlight refracting through my window…
09.01.12
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