05.10.12

Tell me again how it was…
How we were…
So I can understand
The ending to our story..
Maybe a touch…a kiss…
To remind you of
How it was…How we were…
But then I see that
You’re already making
Resolutions to forget…
And though I try to do the same,
I notice that I’ve ran backwards…
Probably, so I’d remember you
For always….however foolish…
But now I’ve grown tired
Of chasing and holding on
To our memories…
They seem a blur these days…
Maybe I’m getting used to your absence…
I notice the white trace
Of that silver band on my finger
has slowly disappeared..
And my hands no longer search for yours…
No longer wanting to fill the spaces in between…

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A Letter to Virginia

Hey Virginia,
I hope this finds you well…
The simplicity of the wisdom
You’ve imparted has been of great help…
It’s been a while since I had my heart broken,
And in the countless times
That I’ve played the events in my mind,
Somehow, I have been able…
To discern the subtle differences you talked of
That between holding a hand
and chaining a soul..
Slowly, I’ve been able to realize
That Love doesn’t mean possession
And company indeed
Does not mean security…
Although I’ve long ago learned that
kisses aren’t contracts
And presents are never promises…
Little by little, I am able to
Accept my defeat with my head up…
with the grace of an adult and not the grief of a child..
But I still cry…
You were right…tomorrow
Will always be uncertain…
I no longer wait for someone to bring me flowers…
Instead I slowly tend my own garden
Despite the absence of a green thumb..
Though I don’t know
If I have enough of the endurance you spoke of,
I’m trying my hardest
to be strong and to see my worth…
I’m still learning from this goodbye…
I know I’ll get better
I hope sooner than later…
Thanks Virginia
Sincerely…

(in reference to Comes the Dawn – Virginia Shopstall)

2009…03.23

The days are long and the nights are even longer, but neither are long enough for moments of rest to last…not enough to feel relief from the day’s draining events, even if one’s day is spent in bed – asleep…sleep doesn’t come easy…one spends countless hours of ┬árestless waking until sleep evades you completely…nocturnal beings like me spend the night rushing…rushing to work..rushing to finish work…rushing to get home after work…and then i attempt to cram everything that’s essential in the remaining hours before my body craves for its right to slumber…my days and nights are never long enough to savor rest or cram the essentials in life…slow down…our lives are continuously spiraling and accelerating towards our eventual end…