Incoherence

i know those eyes
and remember how
they’d look at me…
how they’d see
through me sometimes…
staring into a distance
i could never reach…

i’ve memorized
the curve of your lips
after every kiss – exchanged
and after every smile
you’ve given me…

i’ve memorized
the furrows on your
forehead when you’d think…
or when you were angry…
when you hated me…

they’re all but part of
my memories…
i no longer see your face
and can no longer
feel your touch and your kisses…
though i remember
how it used to feel…
to be held…to be kissed…
to be loved…

i wanted you then…all
i ever wanted was you…
just you…and everything
that defined you…

now all that we share
is silence –
deafening…
it suffocates and torments…
unlike the silence we used
to share..
it was reassuring…
there was happiness in spite..
it was like a song
to which we could
hum along without even
knowing the words…

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